Cyber Safety

Most cyberbullying occurs on social-networking sites, like Facebook, MySpace and YouTube. If your child uses these sites, you should, too.

Every social-networking site has terms of use. They should have tools for blocking and reporting abusive members, too. Most will also have a dedicated section for helping parents.

Facebook, MySpace and YouTube all have safety centers. Familiarize yourself with the guidelines and procedures. Should you need to report bullying, you want to go to the site's safety center. Then show your kids how to use the simpler anti-harassment controls.

Kids need to be aware of the control they have online. In the real world, we tell our kids to walk away. For online interactions, they have blocking. Privacy tools can also keep bullies at bay.

Simply look at a harasser's profile page. There will be a link for blocking or reporting the user. Reporting a user brings the user to the site's attention. The site's administrators can decide to ban the person.

You’ll want to help younger kids set up their profile. I have information for setting up safe profiles on MySpace and Facebook. Be sure to explain privacy controls and concerns to all your kids.

For YouTube, the best thing to do is make videos private. Only select users can access and comment on the videos. Commenting can also be disabled for public and private videos.

If someone else has posted a harassing video, you can flag it. Click the Flag below the video. Specify a reason for flagging the video and click Flag This Video. This should remove the video.

For every site, you need to reinforce guidelines about appropriate content sharing. Bullying can also come by phone or e-mail. However, bullies often get that information from your child's profile. It should be hidden.

You should also "friend" your kids on the social-networking sites they use. This helps you keep track of what your kids are posting. You’ll also see the things people are posting to their profiles. You might need some occasional help understanding what is being said.

One thing to watch for in particular is the fake profile. There is little verification of identity online. This is a serious downside to the Internet. You can say you are anyone. Bullies sometimes pretend to be their victim. They post nasty comments and pictures. It is a quick way to destroy someone's reputation.

You can report impersonating profiles to the site's administrators. This is usually an extension of the abuse reporting. They can help you get the profile removed.

There are other dangers to fake profiles. A group of users harassing your child might just be one person. Creating multiple fake profiles isn't hard to do.

However, harassment isn't the only danger. The fake user could build a friendship with your child. A fake friendship is an efficient tool for manipulating your child's emotions. The psychological effects can be devastating.

Keep an eye on your children's profiles. Ask about their friends on these sites. Be suspicious of people your child doesn't know in person. In fact, they should really only communicate with friends from school and church. If you find a fake profile, report it to the site's administrators.

E-mail has also been used for cyberbullying. Creating a new address is probably better than blocking the bully. Or, report the harassing messages to the provider. Usually, you forward the message to abuse@provider.com, for example, abuse@hotmail.com. Check the e-mail provider’s site for instructions.

Now, your kids also need to be smart about what they’re sending and posting online. They shouldn’t send anything they wouldn’t want the world to see. For example, many teens have sent nude photos to a boyfriend or girlfriend. Once the relationship sours, the photos may be spread around the school. So, be sure to warn your children against sexting.

 

Finally, don't be afraid to get the police involved. If messages or posts are violent or sexual, calling the police is your best bet.

Cyberbullying isn't the only online threat to your children. Here are some tips to help you keep them safe.

• Know what you’re kids are doing when you’re not around. Windows Vista and 7 have built-in parental controls to help you out. 
• Could your kids be sending harassing text messages to others? Here are some tools to monitor your child's cell phone use. 
• Don’t let your kids become addicts. Learn how to spot Internet addiction before it becomes a problem.